Outdoor Recollection

(Story, Non-fiction, 16 years old)

I was sitting here, bored out of my mind, trying to think of a "humorous" anecdote. Now, I, for one, don't usually find spankings funny. . . . I find the things that come out of my mouth funny, sometimes. . . . usually for only a VERY short period of time, however. I was thinking, however, of all the times I've been spanked, and I chanced upon a scenario that was truly funny! Then, it sure as hell wasn't funny. . . . looking back, it was hilarious. The second time I met with my east coast disciplinarian, we met at a hotel. Now, we'd been together for several hours by this point, and there had been some good times, and some bad times. Lo and behold, he decided to exercise his apparently God-given authority, and I was NOT happy with his decision. Like the teenaged child I was, and am, I decided to throw a fit from hell. We were outside on a walk at the time, and there were all of these great brick walls. I LOVE climbing things. I'd rather be anywhere that I can be higher than is normal. I take great pleasure in it. In any case, he'd rather me have both feet on the ground. Something about falling, or slipping, or not allowed, or whatever. You can definitely tell that I listened to those lectures! So, in the midst of my fit, I'm climbing every last wall just for the sake of doing it. Finally, he gets fed up. He grabbed my wrist and pulled me over into a dark, shadowed area. I was bent over his hip, and several bone-jarring swats later, he stood me up. Now, I was wearing JEANS. I dare ANYONE to handspank me over JEANS and accomplish anything. I stood there, arms crossed, glaring defiantly. How dare he spank me? How dare he! Far from calming me down, that just pissed me off. He says, "Do I need to go get my brush?" Well, what was I supposed to say? Probably something calm and respectful like, "No, sir, that's ok. I'm doing fine without it." Unfortunately, that isn't what came out of my mouth. What came out of my mouth was, "Hell no!" That, evidently, is NOT something one is supposed to say to a torqued off disciplinarian. His reply? "Obviously, I do. I'll be right back." He then turned and strode towards the hotel. I was incredulous. I stood there, dumbfounded. Was I supposed to stand around and WAIT for this!??!? I was told that he was smart lol. Like hell. I took off. Now, I wasn't stupid. I didn't go far. I just crossed the street to a wooded area. There were a lot of shadows, and I KNEW that I wouldn't be seen unless he walked up on me. I would be able to see him, but there was NO way he could see me. Well, I was sitting there, and this STUPID security person was like, “Miss, are you ok?” (He appeared out of nowhere!) I said, “Yes, I'm fine. . . i'm just thinking. . .” What I was thinking was, “Disappear. . . you're going to blow my cover!” He kept talking, and I was getting more and more desperate. I really needed him to go away! Finally, he said, “If there's anything we can do, let me know. Then he kept walking, FINALLY! (Now, that's really funny. . . . then, it was NOT. I like to have had a coniption fit trying to get rid of that guard before my disciplinarian came back!) After a couple more minutes, I saw him coming back. Poor guy. He poked around a bit, and then he went and stood where he left me. He looked so dejected. . . .like he thought I would just show up. I took pity on him, and decided to show myself. . . . that's the last time I decide to be helpful lol. I walked up to him and was like, "Umm, hi." He spun on his heel. "I thought I told you to wait on me," as he led me back over to our dark corner of hell. I hadn't seen the brush yet. . . . turned out that it was in his pocket! He pulled it out and started to swat my bottom, and just for the sake of doing it, I started to spin in place. Then I put my hands behind me. . . . He said, “Move your hands. . .” I didn't do it. . . . He bent me back over his hip, and pinned my hands behind me. I lost track of how many swats he gave me, but it certainly was enough to get me yelping. "Now, are you done with your fit?" I didn't answer, as I was still in the midst of a defiant fit. "If you're not, I can sit down on one of those walls you so dearly love and put you over my knee." Now, that did it. I was not prepared to be humilated, in addition to the spanking. My fit was most decidedly over. Unfortunately for me, I received a follow up spanking, a proper one, the next day. Otk, bb, and with that freaking god-forsaken brush.